aloneliness

I've been musing on how lonely the human experience really is. Sounds depressing, I know... but in reading and then realizing how similar we really are it stuck me: we're all alone. Geez, that looks horrible in print! :)


It's very liberating, really. At least I think so; changes my expectations. I don't need others to heal myself, I'm quite capable of taking care of myself if need to. Relying on others for help is great, but expecting others to solve it... well that just leads to frustration and results in depression for me. 


Fits in with your Tribe of One, Susannah. I visualize my socializations as a series of nested circles: at the very centre is Me: a solid, brick-red circle. Surrounded by increasing larger, gradually looser circles of family and friends. 


A couple of years ago when feeling blue I would ask myself "what would your best friend do/say?". Cuz a truly best friend would be honest enough to call you out on misbehaviours: "well, you are eating ice cream every night..." or "no wonder she's upset with you, you did promise to help her on the weekend" as well as provide a calming voice. Be Your Own Best Friend. That's what I call it; very often she's takes on my Inner Perfectionist. And wins!


I read a poem years ago that referred to "some people, infrequent people" as the ones who are True Friends, the ones on the same wavelength as yourself. Who 'get' you. But that most people you meet are not these kind. I have a very small Tribe I realize: I think I prefer to fill it with Infrequent people...


And, luckily for me, my sister Wendy is one of them...